hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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