PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
