And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
