I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
