He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
