I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
