I got chris browned last night
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
