I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
