If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
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