We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize