morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize