Three words: puerto rican gang bang
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize