Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize