No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
