Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
