Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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