what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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