Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
