My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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