Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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