Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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