Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
