So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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