'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
