I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
