Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
two words...techno handjob
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
