i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
