Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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