your parents love me but you hate me
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
