New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
