I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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