what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
