a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
