You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
