I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Randomize