if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Randomize