so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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