I wannas sexs uuuuu
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
