if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
