If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
ugly people sure do ruin things
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize