ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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