So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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