please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
