I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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