Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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