Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
