I can text with my tongue
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize