So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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