I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
