with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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