yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
